this falls on the heals of a couple of posts ago and fits real well with the thoughts of that post...

been thinking a lot about this issue of community, coming out of conversations with j.davey. we’ve both said, over the course of time and in teaching moments with others that American Christian faith is going to have to move, if it’s going to survive at all, into more of a communal – style of relationship. communal…that scares the crap out of some people. scares them because of what we usually think of in ‘communal’ terms; 50 hippies living under one roof sharing one bathroom, etc.
i don’t think that’s where we’re headed.

look at it from the other direction. currently churches operate, for the most part, independent of one another. it doesn’t matter what the churches in our area do. hardly makes a blip on our radar. sure, we pray for them and ask God to bless them and make them effective. we share an annual VBS with some of the other churches around us. but much more than that…not really.

what if it did really matter to us? that we were dependant upon those churches to have a sense of purpose and fulfilling God’s call to the church in the first place. to really gain a sense of community IN the community…that it mattered what we did on a weekly basis when we talk with the other churches…what if we shared sermon series and spoke on similar themes or ideas?
what if there was a real sense of venerability with one another? that we actually aloud other people into our secrets and to see us as our sinful selves?

don’t get excited, i’m not talking about completely uninhibited, total exposure here. there’s no way we’re ready for that!!

example:
i’m in my office, basically waiting for the worship band to arrive for practice. just killing time and playing some solitaire on my computer. sr.pastor davey is in the building waiting for the band also, he plays bass for us. my door isn’t latched and my back is to the door. he knocks, the door comes open and he enters. i, am now in a made scramble to hide the card game [not because cards are evil].

but if they’re not evil, what am i doing?this happened several months ago and i’m a bit of a slow learner so i’m just now getting it…
there is a mental model that if someone, anyone, sees me ‘not doing what i think i ought to be doing’ there are repercussions. repercussions for me on the job, people’s thoughts about what i do and how do what i do, and the list goes on.again, what the heck am i doing?!?!back to this community thing.

if real community is going to happen then there have to be times, regular times, when we put the guards down and let people see us. john has become one of the most open people i know. consistently have conversations that are valuable to us as leaders, as men, Christ-followers…and yet, there are times that i keep him at arms length. why? am i afraid that if he really sees who i am he won’t like what is there? do i think he may then begin to doubt what i’m doing? do i wonder if he just won’t like me in general?
probably yes on all 3 at some time or another.

maybe for real community to start taking place there needs to be an healthy dose of getting real with ourselves and lighten up. something that i’ve found is that if we are real, venerable with others then they end up liking us a bit more. so that gets at our desire to be liked, to belong. also, when we’re open it give permission to others to do the same. this helps us deal with a sense of loneliness that we all fight. feeling like we’re all alone in the problems we face.